Hate speech will not be tolerated.  Go to Wiki and read this article.  Note that there is the “outside the law” definition and the “in law” definition.  For the purposes of this site, protected classes include: nationality, racial, ethnic, disabled, religious, gender and sexual orientation.  On this site, you are free to hold and express the opinion that GLBTs are immoral, or that Christians are bigoted (two common opinions expressed in debates about this subjected).  You are not free to incite, through implication or blatantly,  violence against either.

Until we have a larger staff of administrators, I am the sole arbiter of what is and is not hate speech outside an established legal authority expressing jurisdiction over same.  In other words – the courts trump me, the police trump me, the constitution trumps me – but you as an individual, for purposes of moderating and adminstrating this site, do not.

You will need to register for a forum account in order to comment on discussions there.  I will not spam you with newsletters, site updates, etc.  I will not add your email address to any sort of mailing list.  The only emails you will receive from this domain will be things like registration confirmation, notifications you opt-in for (threads you subscribe to, PM notifications, etc.) and any “emergency” announcements regarding site maintenance if we will be offline for longer than 48 hours.   I will not sell, disburse or otherwise give out your login information to anyone but a valid, recognized legal entity under court order.  With that said, I will not fight such a court order on your behalf if it is part of a criminal proceeding.  You own your words, not me… and if you use your words to violate the law, you will have to deal with that.

Through the course of our discussions, we’re going to establish some standards for what does and does not constitute a reputable source for information.  This will be a community discussion with input invited and welcomed from the membership.  If you quote statistics or studies or the like, you will be expected to back those up with peer-reviewed sources.   I will ban people who consistently post false information or ignore requests for sources.  You don’t get to just talk out of your ass here… you have to prove your point.

With that said – the following are not valid sources for arguments for or against gay marriage:

Religious Texts:  This site is predominantly about marriage equality within the United States.  Our Constitution does not permit for the establishment of a state religion.  We are a nation of multiple beliefs tied to many different religious texts.  Since no one religious text can hold dominance over any other in matters of law in the United States, they cannot legally be used as the basis of legislation here.  It is perfectly fine to say that you believe gay marriage and homosexuality is right or wrong because the Bible/Koran/The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster says so… but since the citizens of our nation are not compelled by law to recognize the authority of your particular religious text, such arguments are specious at best.  Now, before you go wandering off in a huff, consider this:  would you be swayed by an argument against something you devoutly believe in if the source were another religion’s holy book?  Could I use the Koran to convince you that husbands have the right to beat their wives?  Could I use the Christian Bible to convince you that wearing a hijab is silly?

You would not accept the gospel of another religion as a compelling or binding source for legislation, so expecting others to accept your own holy book as such is hypocritical at best.

Non-peer Reviewed Studies:  If you don’t know what this means, Google is your friend.  “Peer” means organizations like the American Psychiatric Association, the American Academy of Pediatrics, the American Psychological Association, the American Medical Association, the American Dental Association, etc. or their international equivalents.  It does not mean 10 fundamentalist or liberal think-tanks backing each other up.

If your argument relies on either of those sources, you should feel confident that at the close of any discussion you have participated in, you will have “lost” the debate – even if no one bothers to refute you since, on both sides of the issues, many of us have likely refuted that same tired source a thousand times before.

Be respectful, be tolerant, be kind.  You can attack and debate and dissect an idea or belief or stance… you don’t get to do the same to a person.  Every screen name here represents a person, and you will either show them basic human respect and courtesy, or you will leave.   I will no more tolerate the bashing of religion than I will tolerate gay bashing.

A biography of each administrator, moderator or anyone else involved in the running of this site will be posted for people to read.  It is only fair that you know relevant information about the background of the people you are relying on to adminstrate this site fairly.  With that said, should you decide to use that information, in part or whole, to stalk, harass or otherwise harm staff members of this site, every effort will be made to see that you are prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law in your jurisdiction.

You will also have an opportunity to post your own biography… this can come in handy when people make assumptions about you (“you’re obviously gay” or “you’re obviously a fundamentalist” or “you’re obviously black/white/yellow/red/purple/blue polkadotted” or “you’re obviously a conservative/liberal/republican/democrat/outer-space alien intent on world domination”) and then, when you refute their claim, they insist you must be lying.  Biographies will include “last edited” time stamps… kind of hard to argue that someone put in their biography 11 months ago that they’re a republican just in case someone claimed they weren’t 11 months later “for convenience.” For now, we will just be encouraging the creation of biographies among members… this is likely to become a requirement for discussion participation in the future.  As with Staff Biographies, should you decide to use information from a member’s biography, in whole or in part, to stalk, harass or otherwise harm a member of this site, every effort will be made to see that you are prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law in your jurisdiction.

These rules are subject to change.  I’m writing these literally the day after I bought the domain.  I have no idea what rules we may or may not need in the future – that is a discussion I hope to have with the entire community as it grows.  Ultimately, however, final decisions about rules will be made by the site administration team.

If you spam, I ban.  If you post porn, I ban.  If you continually repeat the same much-refuted arguments endlessly, I ban.  If you threaten someone with violence or implied harm, I ban.  If you consistently lump all peoples of any group into one category (things like claiming all priests are pedophiles, implying all gays “wave their junk” during Pride Parades, all Christians are bigots, etc.), I will ban you.  If you stalk, harass or otherwise harm a member or staff, I ban.  And let me state, for the record, that I do not care WHAT side of this debate you are on… you might be the greatest supporter of LGBT equality ever to grace the earth… I will still ban you without remorse.

This is not a pay site.  It will never be a pay site.  If a time comes where I am unable to fund the site, I will set up a place for donations.  If that does not suffice (bandwidth can get very expensive VERY fast), I may begin accepting some very limited banner advertising.  I despise banner ads… you can’t begin to imagine how much I loathe them… but I’m realistic enough to know that this is a topic which is likely to draw an enormous amount of traffic over time.  If I cannot sustain funding for that traffic on my own or through donations, we will have to look – as a community – at additional possibilities.

Do not post identifying information about yourself or anyone else on this site.  No addresses, phone numbers, email addresses, etc.  You want to give your info to someone, send a private message through the forum.  But it had better be YOUR info – if I find you are sharing someone else’s info, especially as part of encouraging someone else to harass them, I will not only ban you…I will be asking the police if it is a criminal matter.